I must give pause. And also respect That newbie which could make a Calamity of the device’s life. Who would bear the drops and scratches of time, The user’s wrongs, the proud man’s showy cases, The pangs of rejected friend request, the UI’s lags, The compatible insolence of Office suites, and the loading times That our patience unworthily test? When one might himself his tech Quietus make With a bare feature phone? Who would every year phones bear, To grunt and sweat about every update? But that the dread of being phone-less, Of being in an undiscovered Country, With neither maps nor apps Puzzles the will, And makes us rather bear the ills these have, Than fly to other devices that we know not of. Thus does tech make Cowards of us all, And thus indeed the Native hue of Common Sense Is sicklied o’er, with the pale cast of Tech terror And grand plans to purchase simple gizmos, To just call and text turn awry, And lose the name of Action. With due apologies to Shakespeare. Here’s the original version of the speech.
